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What
Signs Will Tell Me If A Person Is Who They Say They Are?
Are there any signs that indicate a person isn`t really who
they say they are? Yes! There are many clues that you should
be on the lookout for, including: 1. How is this person in
public? Is he/she different in private? If you are seeing
two differnt people, watch out. 2. How do they respond under
pressure or stress? Situations such as these will often
relieve a person's true colors. 3. Are they fairly
predictable?Observe them with others and in as many
different situations as possible. If they are the same 80
percent of the time, that is their dominant character. If
they are unpredictable, you should be concerned. 4. How do
they treat their family? You will be part of the family if
you marry him/her. He/she will probably treat you how he/she
treats his/her family. Keep your eyes open for good and bad
behavior traits and never ignore the negative ones because
you think you are in love.
Dating Tips: Don'ts
There are lots of dating do's; here are are a few 'do nots'
for the first (or any) date. 1. Avoid anything elaborate –
plans and situations that are too intricate leave too much
room for disaster during a first date. 2. Avoid appearing
distracted or not looking into your date's eyes. 3. Don't be
boastful; nothing ruins a date more than needless
pretension. 4. Don't use the date as personal therapy. The
point of the first date is to get to know someone – not to
vent your frustrations, hang-ups or personal history. 5.
Avoid being self-deprecating and always thank your date for
any compliments. 6. Avoid talking about past relationships
while on a date. Nothing ruins a first date more quickly
than someone who can't stop talking about their ex. 7. Try
not to be nervous on your date. A case of nerves can make
the date awkward. Don't try to deal with nervousness by
consuming alcohol, either; getting drunk will make the
situation even more awkward. 8. Keep the first date short.
If it's bad, you can both leave quickly; if it's good,
you're both left wanting more.
Why Sex Should Be Last
It's the $64,000 question: when should a couple have sex?
The answer is probably a bit different for every couple. But
at the 2001 Smart Marriage conference, Dr. John VanEpp
recommended the following sequence of events, which applies
to all couples considering a serious relationship.
1. Know--you must know someone before you get too serious
with them. You must know about their family, their habits,
their values and their lifestyle.
2. Trust--When you start knowing someone, you begin to trust
them more. Trust is something that should be earned and not
easily given.
3. Rely--Once you know someone and you trust them, you can
start relying on them.
4. Commit--Once we know, trust, and rely on someone, we can
then make a stronger commitment to them. That is why the
marriage commitment is so important.
5. Sex--Finally, sex. If you start off with sex, you have
started in the wrong place. In order for a relationship to
be healthy, you MUST know each other, you must trust each
other, you must rely upon each other, and you must be
committed to each other. It is at this point, and only at
this point, that sex is wise and healthy. |